SPOTLIGHT
Sunday, March 29, 2015

.... some of them are even funny.
So I'm sure they won't mind a little fun at their expense!

Q: Why do men become smarter during sex?

A: because they are plugged into a genius

Q: Why don't women blink during sex?

A: They don't have enough time

Q: Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?

A: They don't stop to ask directions

You're laughing, aren't you?!

Q: Why were men given larger brains than dogs?

A: So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties

Q: Why did god make men before women?

A: You need a rough draft before you make a final copy

C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!

And my personal favorite:

Q: Why did god put men on earth?

A: Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.

Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face
and laughter in your heart
- then you are just an old sour fart!

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me,

'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'

'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'

He yelled back, 'University of Oklahoma.'

And they say blondes are dumb ...

A couple is lying in bed.
The man says,
'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'

The woman replies,
'I'll miss you...'

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'

'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumor.

The Woman's Prayer
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual ...'

Tell about this to at least five bright, funny women you know and make their day!

And also tell this to five bright men who have enough sense of humor.

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